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  • Writer's pictureMarilyn & Al Sargent

Are You Handling Change or Is Change Handling You?

Updated: May 4, 2020

Any time we experience a change of any kind, the brain/body system has to adjust to the new situation. When there is massive change - our system can temporarily go into overwhelm as we process new information and try to adjust to the new reality. How do you get into the driver's seat for your life?

Depending on our sense of identity, the beliefs and principles we live by, and the coping skills we have developed, we have more or less ability to manage incoming information. The more solid we are in our own authentic self the more we can prioritize and find resources to be as safe as possible and imagine new pathways around any roadblocks.

Take a moment to do a personal inventory to determine where is your power source. Are you reactive to powers and opinions coming from the outside, or are you proactive with your power coming from inside of you and your choices, decisions, and your ability to set healthy boundaries?

This chart represents a foundation for our personal experience in development. The top picture shows how we much depend on those who are raising us. We are dependent on them to keep us safe, teach us skills, and to guide us in building our sense of self-esteem and strength of character. Naturally, at this stage of life, the power is originally coming from outside of us. And when these arrows are nurturing, protective, and holding a safe space for us to develop, the positive result is shown in the bottom picture as a proactive adult.

The arrows coming from inside-out show a healthy way to move through the world coming from within your sacred space of identity, personal choices, decisions, and ability to take good care of you in the best way you know-how.

Sadly, when the arrows of childhood represent dysfunction, abuse, confusion, blame, judgment, inconsistency, scapegoating - the child may not easily or automatically develop having their power coming from within themselves and the adult will still give away their authority to others. This is extremely dangerous and whenever their significant change, the upset caused can be terrifying.

We encourage you to take this time of chaos and major change happening in the outside world to develop your own inner sense of strength, peace, calm, wisdom, and choice. It’s your personal responsibility to gather information from reliable outside sources and to evaluate that information based on your life experiences and beliefs. Ultimately you become the authority on making any decision that directly affects you. Sometimes the most important decision is in identifying what external sources are worthy of your trust and have your best interests at heart.

-Be curious!

-Answer “what if…?” fear-based questions with workable options.

-Take a personal inventory of your sense of your essence or authentic self.

-Learn new skills.

-Update limiting beliefs.

-Set healthy boundaries against the “energy vampires” of the world.

-Breathe deeply and often!

-Learn how to connect to the information in both hemispheres of your brain and bring those perspectives into agreement and balance.

-Remember, a choice is better than no choice!

As my Mom would always say: “This too shall pass!”

During this crisis time - we offer the first session for free and subsequent sessions at 1/2 price from now through April 2020. In the spirit of social distancing, we will meet via video conference call or phone. This discount will apply to current clients as well.

Contact: 310-729-5664 cell or text or

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